Children Are Very Aware
For those of you who still believe that children are not aware of what is going on around them and that they operate on a reduced level of consciousness, I would like to highlight a few examples. We will see the detailed level at which we record events at all ages in life. These memories, although still in the subconscious, have an effect in our adult life in certain situations. We are attached to them mentally, emotionally and they are the source of many repeating patterns. This happens without us really being aware of it. The rational mind is also unaware of it, in the sense that the events happened before the calculating rational mind developed. Hence there is more than meets the mind here!
In any given situation, when you ask someone where a certain behavior comes from or when they first started doing that, the answer is often, “It’s always been that way” or “As far as I can remember”. These are very common responses because the response mechanism is already in place and has been there since the beginning of memory or since the rational mind began to develop.
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Laura was a woman with a fear of strangers, to the degree that she had great difficulty relating to others. She did not know where this fear came from. She had never had a negative event that she could think of, but it had been with her as far back as she could remember. The effect in her life was that she went through great efforts to avoid meeting new people.
While tracking this feeling of fear we identified a scene where Laura, who is a petite woman, is very scared, and her mother is dropping her off with someone. She (the child) does not want to go with this stranger.
“No, I don’t want to, nooo!!!” she screams.
Focusing attention on her mother, I ask her:
“With whom is she dropping off the child? ”
“With my brother,” responds the mother, “I am just not capable of taking care of her!” She goes on to explain with sadness that she fears for her own future and that she has no choice but to entrust her little girl to her brother and go. Her brother will keep her for a while until she is able to care for her own child.
Curiously, Laura has a perfect memory of her uncle and a great relationship, however in that particular moment, when the fear was conceived, he was a stranger. This fear of strangers was then transferred to her broader relationship with people. This realization became very beneficial to Laura and helped her understand her deep-rooted reaction to new people.
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Patty was a young woman with a great desire to travel and see new places, but she still lived with her parents and she found it impossible to go much more than a few blocks from her house without feelings of anxiety. The furthest she had gone was to a couple of large department stores in the centre of the city.
This remained the same for her until we did a session of deep search into her past and found something interesting. At some point, her parents wanted to send her to a faraway place, however in the end they never sent her. She was still a baby in the scene that she describes and her parents would discuss this in front of her thinking that she was too young to understand any of it. The details of the discussion were a little vague to her in our session but the idea of sending her away was clear.
So she asked her mother about it and she confirmed that they had had discussions about sending her away for adoption because of financial circumstances, but that in the end everything turned for the better and that option had only been discussed as part of solution seeking by the parents. Her mother was greatly surprised because these discussions had occurred when Patty was a very young baby and it had always been a secret between she and her husband.
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Clara was a person with very sensitive hearing and she used earplugs when she slept and also for a better part of the day. Upon hearing sharp high-pitched sounds she would have full body shivers and it could trigger heart palpitations.
In a session where we are tracking her feelings and shivers, we come to a strange place where it is cold and she is all alone. She does not know where she is and she is afraid.
“It’s horrible! ” she says, putting her hands over her ears.
“There are these deafening beeps!”
All of sudden she says: “I am in an incubator!!!”
Afterwards she asked her parents about it. It turns out that she was born about 10 days premature and they had put her in an incubator for a few hours. So Clara’s initial moments after birth were put in an incubator. They had never told her. Clara told her parents how she found out and they could not believe her. They thought that she had gone to the hospital and looked up the hospital records.
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Kim was very sensitive to smells and to heat. Her skin was extremely delicate and she would feel like her skin was burning although there was no heat source. So she avoided exposure to the sun, extreme temperatures; she was very sensitive to hot or cold water and she could only use a special soap to bath. She also had to be very careful with physical contact with others and she even avoided shaking hands when she was introduced to someone.
Tracking the burning sensation, we came to a moment when she was a child of about two years of age and they are rubbing something all over her body and she says:
“It burns and it hurts a lot! I don’t know what it is but it smells very strong!”
When I ask her who is putting it on her, she replies that it is her father.
Moving our conscious focus over to the father’s body, we ask him what he is doing and he replies:
“I am putting alcohol on her skin…”
We ask him, “Why?”
“Well, she has a sore stomach and this helps”.